Terri: Hello and welcome to Heartrepreneur Radio, this is Terri Levine, chief Heartrepeneur and business strategist, and I’m really glad you keep tuning. And I’m particularly excited that you’re here for this episode because I do have a very special guest today, so let me just tell you. With a pink slip in her hand, and the words “you’re fired” echoing in her ear, Bernadette Boas went on a journey and discovered what it took to discover, confront, and shed her bitches of fear, insecurity, and low self-worth, to create and accelerate the riches she possesses in her business and life. And she is here to talk about a formula she came up, the 5-Step Shift to Riches, I just love the name of that, so you can consider what bitches you need to shed to finally create the riches you deserve. Whoo-hoo, welcome to the show Bernadette!
Bernadette: Thank you Terri, thank you very much.
Terri: I just love this, and we were chatting before we went live here on the show, I had the honor and privilege of being on your show a while ago, and I’m so excited to have you here on Heartrepeneur Radio.
Bernadette: Oh, thank you for having me.
Terri: You’ve welcome. So, I have so many different things that I want to ask you. But I really love that you talk about the word “bitch,” bitches of fear, how did you come up with like, language it that way, and deciding the right word for it?
Bernadette: In an emotional breakdown in a conversation with someone! I was just kind of revealing my story and my challenges, and all the sudden she’s like, well why are you getting so emotional about it? And I said because I was such a, or I shedded my bitch and now I’m like this happy, happy person. So, all the sudden, she’s like, that’s a great, even a book. And it went from there.
Terri: So first tell us a little bit about how you actually did this shedding, and then I definitely want to hear about the book. Let’s start with, how did you do this shedded? I mean, I heard the words in my life, “you’re fired,” so I know what that’s like, or at least what it was like for me, so how did you go through this shift?
Bernadette: Well, I realized after I was fired, I really kind of had to sit back and say, why did that just happen? I was a very talented, skilled individual, but during my own discover classes, I was realizing that the leadership style I chose for my self was more aggressive, more curt, more demanding as opposed to a commanding, leadership personality. And I hated when I discovered that, I felt so ashamed that I was cruel to other people, or I was demeaning, or curt or abrasive, and I just knew I had to, at the same time I wanted to. I wanted to put good in the world, like Heartrepreneur does, I wanted to put heart into the world, and not the type of angst I was wreaking havoc on to so many people. And so, I just went through this discovery process, that I had to confront those bitches, which I discovered that because I realized Terri, that people aren’t per say, bitches. It is their insecurities, negativities, fears and doubts that cause them to lash out in that way. And that’s why I kind of categorized those emotions, those inner-demons, because as the bitches, because that’s what really get people to just be, not the person they should be I’ll say.
Terri: Yes, yes. Wow, this is, I mean this is fascinating. I remember when I was given the words “you’re fired,” in Corporate America and I really did look back on how I reacted and how I responded, and there was a lot of me that had some, won’t I won’t want to call, some Corporate bitchiness. So, it’s kind of interesting.
Bernadette: Right, right.
Terri: Now how did you decide to write the book, and what was the process like?
Bernadette: The process was amazing. The same women I was having a break-down in front of when she said that would make a great book, or a greater kind of brand, so to speak, cuz we were at a business conference, I just said to myself, you know I’ve been journaling since I was eight or nine. I have 100’s of journals, they might be able to tell me something, and at the same time once Cassidy told me, gave me this idea, I started talking to people about it. Like, would you learn from someone who is acknowledging that they were this type of Corporate tyrant, and that they’ve made changes and shifts in their lives, would that be valuable to you? I was inundated with women and men that said absolutely. So, I went just along and I kind of started kind of journaling my story as I saw it right then and there, but then I did go back to my previous journal, and really kind of look through them to see if there was something that I could learn from, and if there was something they were trying to tell me. And it was, oh my gosh, it was so eye-opening. I believe in journaling, and it’s something that I’d never read them before, I never would go back through my journals and read them before. I would just write and scribble, and then move on, and here I decided I was going to stick with my words, however they were, whether I liked them or not, that’s the confronting, so it’s discovering and confronting. And the I knew if I wanted to change, if I wanted something different, something new, I would have to shift, or shed, what I didn’t like about myself.
Terri: Wow, that’s profound. You know I’ve been journaling since I’m 17, which is quite a long time, and one of the things I do is I go back every year and I’ll randomly pull out five, 10 journals, and I’ll read through them.
Terri: It’s amazing, right? The process of journaling is amazing, and the process of reading what you’ve written and what’s happening in your life, and in your business, is just phenomenal, right?
Bernadette: Ya, it is. And I’ll still admit that I don’t go back and read what I write even today. I kind of purge it, and let it take a life of its own, however, to your point, I’m sure there will come a day where I’ll want to write the second, third or fourth chapter of this journey, and therefore will go back and rely on those journals to kind of help me with that.
Terri: Ya, it’s great that you’re keeping them I think on so many levels, I think that’s awesome. So, I know that many people call you a ball of fire. What does that mean when people are saying: well Bernadette, she’s a ball of fire! What does that mean?
Bernadette: I think it really means, it kind of interprets a leadership style that I’ve also uncovered and now, you know, really look for in individuals. I think it’s one who does seek out their goals and their dreams despite their fears. It’s one who is kind of bold in how they approach, first themselves, because I truly believe everything starts with you first. And then they just go out and hope to be able to take on life with those fears, though they look at them as just being simple uncomfortable when they come up, so they push through that uncomfortable feeling in order to realize the riches that they want in aspect of their life. So, ball of fire to me is someone who’s kind of bold, risk taking, every-learning, ever-growing, and really just wanting to be their true self.
Terri: Mm wow, a lot like a Heartrepeneur.
Bernadette: It is, it is! No I would agree with you.
Terri: I love it, I love it. And then you talk about the shift to riches formula, so say a little about that please.
BB: Well I had discovered through my own, I would say, year and a half, two years leading up to writing the book, I discovered that I did go through these stages. Almost like the stages of mourning death or a divorce, and I realized that I had to discover myself. I to then confront those things I loved myself, but those things that I also didn’t like about myself, actually that I hated about myself. And then I needed to shed what it was that I no longer wanted to carry forward with me, while I also enhanced and enriched those aspects of myself that I did love about myself. And then you would move on to once you’ve really discovered, confronted and shedded all of those things, there is no way that you don’t want to create something different, something new, a shift in your life. And therefore, you go about really kind of upping your game, or changing your goals or whatever the case might be, and as you are creating, there is nothing that will stop you from wanting to accelerate that feeling of just freedom, and self-love, and giving. And at the same time receiving, learning how to receive cuz many of us, especially women, we’re not good receivers, we’re good caretakers. And so, this formula of discovering, confronting and shedding the bitches in your life in order for you create, accelerate the riches in your life, is just kind of a view on the fact that it’s not just about your skill. But it also about your mindset that has to be worked on each and every day in order to achieve your goals.
Terri: Mm, I think that’s fabulous, I think that’s so important. So, if someone’s listening right now, Heartrepreneur listening right now and they’re saying I want to do something, I want to take some action in this moment, and I want to start my shift to riches. What’s something they could physically do that would start to make a change for them?
Bernadette: Well if they could jot down while they’re listening to this, if they could jot down those five steps, even the little bit that we talked about. And I would say if they had carried with them a journal, I have a small little one, pocket sized one, that allows me to pull it out when I need to or want, and if they really just start getting to know themselves. Physically just pay attention to what makes them happy, what doesn’t make them happy. What gives they joy, what gives them angst or just frustration, and then just really kind of want to acknowledge those things. And then they decide for themselves, not let any other people influence them, but decide for themselves what it is that they want to carry forward, and what it is that they want to shift, or shed, or change and start anew. So, for me, journaling is a really great, great tool, not just a hobby or a passion of someone’s, but also a tool that they can use in their business, in their career, in their life and all aspects.
Terri: Thank you for that. It’s interesting to me, I don’t know I’ve been coaching, consulting 20-something years and one of the first things that I have my clients do is start to carry a journal, just like you said.
Terri: So I think it is probably the simplest, the easiest and yet one of the best coaching tools. Because you do get to know yourself, hear your inner-voice, get to decipher your real true wants, your likes, your dislikes. I think that’s fabulous, fabulous advice, thank you for that. Where can people get your book?
Bernadette: Well of course it’s on Amazon, so they can go to Amazon and just look up Shedding the Corporate Bitch. They call also go to balloffireconsulting.com and it’s there as well.
Terri: So, get your book, I highly recommend this, male or female. I think it’s going to be very powerful and very, very helpful for you, Shedding the Corporate Bitch. And then the website one more time?
Terri: And it’s easy to remember because here I am, talking to Bernadette Boas who is the ball of fire, right? You know and I’ll just say to the listeners, you know maybe you haven’t been fired, maybe you haven’t had a Corporate position. In my experience, it doesn’t matter. We all have these elements and these pieces, male or female of some, pardon my language here, bitchiness. So, taking a good look at ourselves and really taking a look at this process is going to be extremely beneficial, so go and get a copy of Shedding the Corporate Bitch. Bernadette, anything else that you want to add before I allow to give some info so people can connect with you?
Bernadette: I would just say, and I say this often. You have one life to live, it goes really, really fast, so decide for yourself how you want to live it, what you want to experience, and what you want to leave when this one life is passed on to others. And you know, just live it, just be you and live it.
Terri: Aw I have goosebumps from that, oof. I often say to clients, how do you intent to experience your life, because in every moment you get that choice, and you get the power to create that. Life is so precious and it’s short. Oh wow, you have been a ball of fire! How can people get in touch with you, find out about your consulting and your services?
Bernadette: Well they can definitely go to balloffireconsulting.com and they’ll see all my services, and my training, and my speaking and the places that I’ll be. At the same time, they can reach out to me directly, which a lot of people do, they can reach out to me at firstname.lastname@example.org, and I would love to help them in any way possible.
Terri: You have already helped, you’ve been awesome, true Heartrepreneur Bernadette Boas, thank you so much for being my guest here on Heartrenpreneur Radio today.
Bernadette: Thank you
Terri: You are welcome, thank you for tuning into Heartrepreneur Radio, we want you to come back and not to miss an episode. And the best way to do that is actually to subscribe to the show right on iTunes, so go ahead and subscribe to the show, that way you will never miss an episode of Heartrepreneur Radio. And if you go over to heartrepreneur.com, we’ve got some extra free resources and tools just to help you have more heart in your business and in your life. Thank you for tuning in today, thanks for joining me, and I’ll see you next time on Heartrepreneur Radio.