Child Whisperer and Self-Confidence Mentor Tameka Anderson inspires both parents and children alike to be the best versions they can be. Growing up as a foster child, Tameka struggles a lot with believing in herself. She then took this struggle later on to impart what she learned in her journey to self-discovery to parents who want their kids to have more confidence and happiness. She discusses the story behind building Create-A-Kids Club and what it tries to achieve. Sharing three formulas to tap the best version of your little ones, she shows parents the capabilities and power within each of us and to show our children this value.
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Bringing Out Your Child’s Inner Confidence with Tameka Anderson
I have somebody special here. We are going to talk about some topics that we haven’t talked about here at Heartrepreneur Radio. My special guest is Tameka Anderson. She is an author, a court-appointed special advocate for youth and foster care, specialty foster parent and she also sits on the Governor’s Board of Children and Family Services Task Force team. She’s a kid coach known as Child Whisperer and self-confidence mentor for professional moms. She has coached moms for years to build confidence, boost performance and to increase happiness in their children. She’s born and raised in Chicago, Illinois. I used to live outside of Chicago many moons ago. She now resides in Atlanta, Georgia.
She has three biological children, 21, seventeen and seven, and a foster child aged seven. I bet that keeps here busy. She also started Create It Kids Club and that’s where she teaches children how to boost confidence to be the best versions of themselves, so they excel in school and life. Her why is because she was a foster child and no one thought enough to teach her how to be confident in who she was. She struggled a lot in school and in life. She didn’t have to if she had only had the skills to believe in herself. Tameka, welcome.
Thank you so much for having me.
I’m excited to have you. I find your background interesting and I can certainly see how it led you to where you are. Let’s talk about why moms need help in learning how to boost confidence and happiness in their kids. Shouldn’t that just be natural in moms? They just do that?
What I’ve learned over the years of working with children and moms is it is something that is not on the top of your brain. Dealing with life and issues and bosses, especially if you have crazy ones, and the day-to-day everything, that’s not something that you even think about even though it is very important. I don’t hold it against them.
How do these moms raise their hands and show up and say to you, “I need to understand that self-confidence and building confidence in my kids and helping my kids?” How do moms even know that they need help and if they do need help, how do they find you?Being confident makes you taller. Click To Tweet
It’s so funny because I totally understand what the power of word of mouth gets you because that’s what happened with me. What happened was once I found out this was the secret, I started going to different places where there were kids. I went into daycare centers, schools, after-school programs, community centers, you name it. Wherever kids were, I was there. I began to educate the parents and ask them questions like, “Does your child do this? Do you struggle with that?” They’re like, “I did. How did you know?” I dropped the little clues and hints that that’s going on then this is the thing. What happened is people start telling their friends and their friends told their friends. The rest is history.
That’s a beautiful, authentic and transparent way to build a business. I’m going to celebrate and honor you for that. That’s what being a Heartrepreneur is about. You started Create It Kids Club. Tell us about that. It was fascinating to me. I thought this is so important that I want people to know about Create It Kids Club. This is something that we need to be aware of and be alerted to because I come off very confident as an adult but as a kid, I was super introverted. I know people find that hard to believe. I was very shy and I didn’t have confidence in myself. I didn’t like school. I didn’t pay attention in school. I’m a talker. The truth is that when I developed the inner game and inner confidence in life, which was later in life, then everything became magical and I always wondered what would that have been like if it was there in me as a child. Please talk about Create It Kid.
The reason why it’s named Create It Kids Club is because that’s exactly what the children do. The curriculum that was designed is specifically to bring out the inner goldmine that is in each child. They create their entire story. What we do is we create little stage play productions for the youth to perform for their parents. One of the things that I’ve learned is that once I started getting on stage and getting in front of people and started just who I was, I became more confident. My voice became stronger and my stance was taller. People think I’m taller than I actually am. It’s because of confidence. I begin to be immersed in these children getting on the stage. They are thrown on the stage day one.
The parents are like, “Are you serious?” I’ll never forget one of our students. She was about ten years old. Her mom brought her and said she’s extremely shy. I was like, “Don’t worry about it.” Long story short, we have an end of the year party where we have the red carpet. They do a production and everything. She was the star of the show. She was owning the stage. Her grandmother was like, “Are you serious?” It’s all about the child bringing out their self-expression. They create the story, the props, everything. All I do is sit there and say, “Great job.”
The name says it completely then. It’s beautiful. I was laughing about what you said about being taller. I’m very short. I’m 5’1″ but a lot of my clients that have talked to me on the phone for years or have seen me on webinars and we haven’t met in person until they come to an event. The first thing they say is, “You sound a lot taller on the phone.” They always laugh about that and as you were talking, I thought, “I wonder if it’s because I do sound confident.” It’s interesting. What do you think is the number one thing that we can be doing as a society to boost confidence in our kids every single day? What should moms, dads, aunts, uncles, teachers, everyone on the planet know to do when they are amongst young people?
There is a three-part formula that I tell parents to use that would help to boost their confidence. Number one, engage. Engaging with your child helps to boost their self-confidence. Number two, empower them. When you empower them, you show them that the power is already in you. You don’t have to seek it from someone else. That helps to boost their confidence. Number three, set expectations for your child. I can’t tell you how important that is for parents to set that expectation. Set the bar for your child. Once you add all those three together, then your child will excel. My oldest child is 21. She tells her friend all the time, “I’ll never forget when I was younger, I brought home all A’s and my mom was like, ‘You set the bar. Therefore, that’s all I want to see.’” I let them set the expectation. I set the expectation to say, “You did this. You showed me that you can do it so that’s what I want to see.” When you add all those together, then you will be able to create confidence in your child. They become top performers in everything they do and they are just superstar kids.
I want the audience to pay attention. It was engage, empower, expectations. I like that and as you are talking, I’m thinking about myself. There are two things that show up for me, so we will have you respond to these. One was when I was age five, I was asked to be the speaker at a brand-new school that was opening, a huge school in New York where I lived at the time that went from kindergarten through twelfth grade. It was a massive school. Somehow, they went around to fifth grade classrooms. I was a young first grader.
They came into my classroom. My mom dressed me right that day and they said, “We’ll pick this kid.” I have no idea what I’m being chosen for. Don’t forget, I’m introverted. They told me what to say and I was going to go on stage in front of, at the time, 1,500 people. I remember right before I went on stage, I wasn’t scared, I wasn’t nervous. It didn’t seem like any big deal. The guy who was walking me on stage said, “Just go out there and have fun.” I have always remembered that. I went out there and I had fun. I never got nervous. I never got butterflies and I have been speaking on stages ever since. I’m glad that someone empowered me and set up the right expectations.
The second one is my dad was so supportive of every decision I made in my life, “You can do it. You can do that.” “I’m going to take this higher class and I don’t know if I’m going to succeed.” “Yes, you are. You can do it. You are going to do it.” “I want to go to Ithaca College. I don’t want to go anywhere else. It’s the only place I want to apply.” “You are going to get in.” In every single thing, he was so inspirational and helped in my confidence. Any responses to my two stories?
I love it because that’s exactly right. That’s exactly what they are supposed to do. They covered all the bases. They engaged with you. They empowered you. They set the expectations and you excelled.
I wish my dad was alive to hear that, but I know he can somehow. Thank you. This is not a real business topic and I’m going to say this is a real business topic. This is a serious business topic because our young people are our future entrepreneurs and your kids can be working in your business. It’s a smart tax deduction to have them do it. Why not start early? Why not make sure that we are empowering our young people. Do you have any thoughts about that, Tameka?
My children work in my business. My two oldest are my camp counselors when I had the summer camps and my youngest, she’s part of my demo. She loves the camera, so any time I do any type of advertising or anything like that, she’s ripe and ready for it. They all work in my business and I love it.The power is already in you. You don’t have to seek it from someone else. Click To Tweet
How can the audience connect with you and get in touch with you? What’s the best way to engage with you?
For parents, I have a website and it’s www.ParentingConfidentKids.com. You can get in touch with me right there and all of the information will be there for you.
We can all remember it and it speaks to the result. Thank you so much and I encourage everyone to care and make a difference using the three-part formula. Engage, empower, expectations. It’s so brilliant. It’s so beautiful. Tameka, thank you so much for being here. I learned a lot and I feel more empowered.
That’s so awesome and thank you so much for having me. This has been a blast and I’m happy I connected with you.
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About Tameka Anderson
Child Whisperer and Parenting Partner (because who are we kidding, Parenting Coach sounds too formal), Tameka is based in Atlanta, GA and she has partnered with parents all over the world helping them draw out their children’s inner gold mine and encouraging these little ones to lead with confidence.