You Are Responsible For Yourself
Let’s face it if you own a business you are responsible to yourself and for yourself. Your business depends on your ability to market yourself. You are the person who actually needs to do self-marketing to grow your business, increase your credibility and to grow your brand.
When I look at social media I am disturbed by how many people don’t seem to understand the importance of self-marketing skills and how in need entrepreneurs are of self-marketing tips and self-promotion skills. It seems that people come to social media with one agenda – to push their product or service or even a viewpoint on others. That is not networking or marketing. And it isn’t just done wrong on social media, either.
I will share how to actually do self marketing right. First, I need you to accept the overall principle of marketing yourself which is to care more about the outcomes and results others need and want vs. what your desired outcomes are. This means you can’t be prepared to sell people and overcome their objections and push your products or services or ideas on them. Instead, you need to care more about the outcomes others will receive from the value you can create personally and professionally. Whenever you interact with people online or offline be certain their needs are higher than your own needs. My mother used to say that if you focus on helping other people you will find they will help you. I agree. This is a basic principle of being a Heart-repreneur® business.
Let’s begin our conversation with your appearance. Your physical appearance does matter a lot. You must be neat and very well groomed. In fact, the way you look and how you dress quickly gives someone an impression of you.
Humans size each other up very quickly. We get attached to first impressions of people even if we have a lot of evidence to the contrary. You have probably heard the saying, “You don’t get a second chance to make a first impression”. This is true. Judgments are being made about you and impressions formed all the time.
Even your handshake is being assessed. So yes, first impressions matter and you need to make the best first impression you can make. It’s not only how you dress, it is how you stand and how you carry yourself. Do you exude confidence in your smile and your posture and your handshake?
While the words you speak are important so is the tonality and rhythm of your voice. Your eye contact counts, too. Your clothes are being assessed as well so think about what you are wearing and how you want to be received and what image you want to convey.
I recently saw a “famous” woman give a talk on a big stage. She was wearing a white sheer blouse that showed a lot of cleavage and that you could see through. She might have thought she looked sexy. The audience didn’t like her the instant she came out on stage and her blouse killed her effectiveness. Women were put off by her as their partners were staring at her and the partners might have enjoyed her sexy appearance yet didn’t take her message seriously and also decided not to buy the product she was offering. Her message didn’t get across and her product didn’t sell either.
It’s clear that you need to be neat and also need to consider all aspects of your physical appearance and grooming.
You also need to make certain you smile a lot. People like people who smile. It’s natural to be attracted to someone who appears friendly and approachable. Wear a smile on your face.
Pay attention to your body language. Crossed legs or folded arms mean you are closed off and shut down. Open body language means you are friendly and receptive. Who would you be inclined to welcome into your world? Someone who appears shut down or someone who appears happy, gentle, friendly and kind?
Pay attention to your own communication. Do you speak in long sentences or mostly about you? People want to be with people who are interested and not interesting. Notice how often you say, “Me, my, I”. If the conversation is all about you people will want to stay away from you. On the other hand, if you are a great listener and share thoughts in a concise way, people will gravitate to you.
Notice your attitude. People want to be with people who are positive and encouraging and happy. If you are a whiner or complainer and filled with negative thoughts and negative talk get a life coach to help you transform your thinking. No one wants to be with someone who is a “negative nelly”.
Applying The Tips: Case Study
One of my client family members was going to speak at an event. He anticipated meeting over 80 new prospective clients at the event and was very excited to be asked to speak there.
He wanted my help planning for the event and to make a big impression on the producer of the event, the other speakers, and especially to have prospective clients excited to do business with him after hearing him speak on stage.
He asked me to help him create his talk. I told him that was the easy part. He thought I was kidding. I told him there are only three components to a great talk and we could handle those in a few minutes.
Then, I shocked him. I told him that his clothes, his attitude, his grooming, his tone and his body language would not win him clients. I tell my clients the truth. They hire me for truth and not for me to cheerlead and say “happy” things. I told him my truth. He was poorly groomed, his clothes were not professional and he looked like he took no time to put himself together. Most of the time he was complaining and not a positive person to be around. And, his body language gave off a tone of arrogance.
He took this all in with my reminding him he hired me to tell him when the baby was ugly and to help him make more money in less time. He then agreed with me helping him with what was not quite right yet in his non-verbal marketing of himself as well as improve his all over self-marketing.
Within a few short weeks we had his presentation nailed and solid and he was super confident of his presentation and excited to stand on stage. He had a new haircut and clean and trimmed fingernails. He selected black pants and a black dress shirt with a bright red tie for the event. He invested in a portable steamer to take on the road with him.
When he stood on stage or when speaking to others he now had an open stance, a big smile and he listened far more than speaking. He monitored his self-talk to delete things that were mostly about him or that weren’t adding positivity to a conversation.
I had him video a practice session with me and then share it with a few close friends and family members. They noticed his physical appearance and told him he looked very professional and confident and like a person they would want to get to know.
Then, asked him to find one prospective client and ask them their opinion. He was nervous about doing so yet followed my guidance. The prospective client watched the video presentation and told him he had communicated his message clearly and then asked him how much it cost to hire him!
Learn And Apply
If you read an article or hear a talk I consider those things shelf help. Things you put on a shelf and say you will re-visit them again, someday. I want this article to be self-help. This article contains information you can actually put to use to make transformation within yourself. I don’t speak or write to provide education or information. I am all about transformation and making something happen for a reader or listener as a result of what they have learned.
So, I ask you, what will you do to actually be certain you have learned this information and how will you use the tips here and apply them to your business.
There is a real difference between business owners who receive information and then move on vs. business owners who receive information and instantly apply the information.
Many years ago I attended a seminar with a fellow business owner. We both marveled at the information the speaker shared and we both agreed it was life and business changing and we needed to apply it right away. I went to my hotel room that night and began a document for implementing these new ideas and then created an action plan from the document and put many actions on my calendar for the next 30 days. I could hardly wait to get started.
I was so excited to share my document and actions and could hardly wait to see what she had done. We met for breakfast early the next morning and before I even got to share, she told me how she went on for drinks that night and was out very late and complained how tired she was for the second day of the seminar.
Fast forward a year later .. my business was running at double the revenues and profits and I was actually working less and enjoying my life more. How? By actually doing what I learned in that seminar and working on the document I created and the action plan and putting those actions on my calendar and taking those actions every month for a year.
My friend? She was complaining about her slow business growth and her frustration with how much time doing business took her.
We sat at the same seminar. We heard the same lecture. We both said it was life and business changing.
What was one thing that was different for us? I took the action and transformed based on the information we heard. She did not take action.
So, how about you? When you read an article the best thing to do is to take a ten-minute physical action based on that article so you begin your own transformation.
I shared this article with two client family members before publishing it. One of my client family members made a pedicure appointment and also decided to go to a clothing store over the weekend. She took an action and made the article come alive for her and is doing something for her business.
The other client family member went through his closet right after reading the article and got rid of everything that wasn’t in tip-top condition. He also trimmed his beard.
Notice, they both took physical actions and began to do something with the information they absorbed. This is what makes them stellar coaching clients, by the way.
Now It’s Your Turn
You now get to decide. You read this article because something in it caught your attention. When the student is ready the teacher appears. It is now in your hands to either use this information to improve yourself and your business or to go about your day and keep on doing what you have been doing.
I wrote this article to make a difference for you. I care about you and your business and I know the tips I shared here can make all the difference. You might think they are small and not see the ideas as profound. I know how much impact they have had on me and on my client family members.
Here are some physical actions you might take:
- Connect with us for more tips and tools
- Listen to our radio show for more advice
- Read more helpful articles in our magazine
- Join a local Heart-repreneur® Circles group
- Post a comment on this blog