Have you ever really thought about the question “what is love?”.
Have you ever tried to define what “love” actually means?
Many people say love can’t be explained and it is a feeling that you can not measure.
While there are many definitions, both religious and non-religious, of love, I say love is different for each person. While humans can experience love, I believe the experience is unique for each person and so it the expression of love.
There are songs, books, movies, TV shows and constant memes about love yet still many people can’t clearly define “love”.
I have my own definition of the word love. For me, love is, allowing others to be their uniquely beautiful selves and fully seeing another for who they are and appreciating their being. Love doesn’t have to be physical. In fact, some of the deepest love I have experienced has been by being adored by another and unconditionally accepted by them and when I have felt so much adoration for another I almost could not contain myself. I have learned to love others by never seeing any imperfections in them and only seeing their unique human soul. I mutually respect others and I expect nothing from anyone else. To me, this is love. No expectations, no judgments, and no limitations.
When I am loved and when I am loving I feel total bliss and peace. As I see more differences between myself and others I choose to love each person for who they are rather than who I might have thought they should be.
When I studied A Course In Miracles they said: Teach only love for that is what you are. I agree. Loving yourself and loving others is a decision.
You can not be loved or love others unless you love yourself. You will have no love to give if you aren’t in love with yourself. When you give love to others and love is unconditional and given freely they can give you love freely, too.
I say, “I love you” often. It is a gift I say to myself and to others. I actually look in the mirror each day and remind myself I am loved by myself. Then I have enough love inside of me to love others.
There is no universal answer to, “what is love” then. To experience deep love, begin by creating more self-love. Some of these tips have helped me and the clients I have helped through my book About To Break: The Path To True Forgiveness.
Try these tips to increase your capacity for self-love. Once you are truly in blissful love with yourself you will find others will show you more love and your heart will be open to embrace and love others as well.
- Spend time alone
Go to a movie, on vacation, out to dinner, take a hike, or engage in any other activity and enjoy being alone with YOU! Once a week I spend time alone on a “date” with myself. I also travel alone and vacation alone and get to know myself really, really well.
2. Learn to forgive
I believe that learning to forgive yourself, others and life experiences can make the biggest difference in your life. Grab a copy of About To Break: The Path To True Forgiveness and do the exercises in the book and then come to the live forgiveness retreat.
By writing down your feelings and thoughts about yourself, others and what you experience, you will begin to notice when you are not fully loving and gentle and shift your thinking to focus on what IS working.
4. Slow down
Take frequent breaks to breathe and to speak kindly and lovingly to yourself reminding yourself you are human and don’t need to be perfect – ever.
5. Enjoy a hobby
Find a sport or any hobby that you find relaxing and/or energizing. Make sure you spend time doing more than working and focusing on what is not quite right yet.
Spend at least 5 minutes a day doing some form of breathing. I use transformational breathing which helps me relax fully and clear my mind.
7. Engage in EXTRAordinary self-care
Take care of your body, mind, and spirit by doing things that nurture you.