Terri: Welcome back to Heartrepreneur Radio. This is Terri Levine, Chief Heartrepreneur and Business Strategist. And I am super-duper excited about today’s episode and I’ll tell you why. A couple of months ago, I had the pleasure of meeting Mary Fran Bontempo who I’d wanted to meet for a long time. Her name kept flying around in my local community, and I’m like, how have I not met this woman yet? And I actually got to hear her speak, and I was blown away, totally blown away. So, let me introduce her to you so you can have the same pleasure that I’ve had. Mary Fran Bontempo is an award-winning author, speaker, and she’s a humorist who believes in the power of women. And for over 30 years she’s written for and about women and girls, and she shared laughter, joy, and as she says sometimes hysterical tears. She has a lifestyle blog called “Not Ready for Granny Panties,” and I have to tell you, you’ve got to check that out. And she’s the author of 3 books, and a former newspaper columnist. She has one of the books that’s sitting here on my desk which is “The Women’s Book of Dirty Words,” you will love this. It takes on the everyday words that make women cringe, and she actually shows readers how to re-define their dirty words, clean up their self-talk, and that’s what we all want, right? She’s gonna help you get a more vibrant, productive and joyful life. One of the things that I was so impressed with, is she received recognition from the Erma Bombeck Writers Workshop and Humor Press. And I just have to tell you, I want you to not only hear her speak, I want you to connect with her, and I really, really want you to read her books because they are a delight. So, let’s get rolling here, hi Mary Fran!
Mary Fran: Hi Terri! You know I have to say I really want to meet this woman, whoever she is, because she sounds fantastic!
Terri: Well I met her and I can attest she is!
Mary Fran: You know I always tell women that they should write their own intro somehow, or have your best friend write their intros. Because when you hear the things that you’ve accomplished out loud, you’ll be blown away by how fantastic you are.
Terri That’s really funny, I love that. That’s actually really funny. Ya, I don’t think I’m going to write my own bio anymore, I think I’m going to let people just say whatever from now on.
Mary Fran: Let you best friend introduce you, it will be fantastic.
Terri: I love it, that’s great, that’s great! So, I’m going to share something very transparently with the listeners. When I heard Mary Fran speak, we had her speaking in a not ideal situation, that actually was almost humorous in itself. And she was able to use everything that was going on in this kind of awkward speaking situation she was put in, which made the talk even for me, stayed in my mind longer. Because you were actually living and breathing all the things you were talking to us about. I just wanted to honor you for that.
Mary Fran: I really appreciate that. You know I think that’s what it all comes down to. It comes down to taking whatever insane experience is handed your way, and dancing your way through it, and just making the best of it. And you know, 9 times out of 10 we dread these things, and they work out fine. Which is one of my dirty words, “fine,” things worked out fine, so thank you for that. It was quite an interesting experience, though.
Terri: It’s a good way to say it! And I will tell you, it really did, it left quite an impression on me. Well you know I have to also say, as to the names of your books, “Not Ready for Granny Panties,” right, and “The Women’s Book of Dirty Words,” when you first hear those, I don’t know what other people thought, but I was like uh-oh what’s this?
Mary Fran: Yes, and that was done with the exactly that intention, to get that reaction from people. That was intentional.
Terri: Really? And it works perfectly. So, tell us how these books came to be? I’m just curious and I know the listeners would love to hear the story.
Mary Fran: Well I was a very, very dark period in my life about 7 or so years ago. The economy was tanking, it was threatening our family business, I was losing all of my newspaper jobs due the influence of the internet. I was turning 50, which at the time I thought was so traumatic, and now I think ohhh, I wish I could get that number back!
Terri: I hear you!
Mary Fran: But worst of all, my son was in the throes of heroin addiction and that was just devastating. But, in lamenting all of this with a friend of mine one day, I guess I was talking about aging and I just said, oh, I’m so not ready for granny panties. And at that moment, the writer in me perked up, and I thought, I can do something with this. So, I made a conscious decision to move forward, and turn my face toward the light, whatever that happened to be in any given day. And ended up creating this entire world, getting my son into treatment, so I all came out of a really dark time, which is important I think for people to hear.
Terri: Hmm, I love that. You know it’s funny, I was talking to another guest that’s gonna be on the show in a few weeks, and we were just chatting and she said, everybody has a story. And if they embrace their stories and look at the lessons in their stories, it not only helps them but can truly help other people. And that’s a lot of what you’re doing, yes?
Mary Fran: I think it is, and I actually tweet that saying: everybody has a train wreck. Because everybody has something in their life that has the potential to really throw you off course. That change, which we also look at as a dirty word, sometimes that’s like the Cosmos kicking you in the butt and saying, you know what, you need to make a shift here. So, we need to be aware of those things and look for the potential in even the most difficult of circumstances.
Terri: Thank you for saying that, how true is that. So true. So, gotta go back to Granny Panties, I didn’t share this with you but I just have to. Maybe 10 years ago, a group of people was at a Holiday lunch, and they went into the restroom with a young woman, I mean I think she was 35 maybe 40, and she was adjusting herself and she had on granny panties! Like truly, ok! And these other women said oh my gosh, you can’t wear that because it’s going to make you feel and act old, and it’s going to have a bad effect on your whole state of being. And they literally took her, left there, they went to the mall, they went to Victoria’s Secret and they brought her underwear! I’m sharing this because I saw the woman at another Holiday party about 2 weeks later, and she to me, I can’t tell you how different I feel, I feel so sexy ever since I have different panties. And I just have to laugh about that. So, granny panties are not just unmentionables, what else are they to you?
Mary Fran: I say, you know that’s exactly right. But I say that it’s a state of mind, as much as it is a giant pair of unmentionables. And that’s what we have to be aware of, because what happened to that young woman is exactly what happens to us in a figurative way. We get stuck in these ways of thinking that really come from decades of certain behavior, which are very normal and very common. But it’s when we get stuck in that and we start to live our lives the way we used to be, and not the way we want to be, and who you want to become, that’s when we get stuck in those mental granny panties, and that’s really what I’m talking about.
Terri: Wow, I love this, this is fantastic, I love this. So, you also when we were together at our talk, you were talking about a bit about the dirty words and commandments, and a lot of those stayed with me. Would you be willing to share that concept with the audience? I think they’re going to love it.
Mary Fran: Absolutely. I mean it was funny because I did the first book which was The Eleven Commandment for Avoiding Granny Panties, that’s the subtitle of it. My daughter actually came up with that, she said you know we always have to live with so many rules and we’re always policing ourselves. So, I thought well why not do something like that, and come up with something that keeps us from being stuck. That kind of frees us. So that was how the 1st book came about, and then the 2nd book I started to think about our self-talk and the way we speak to ourselves. Everybody’s aware of the self-talk that says, oh you’re not good enough. But for me, it was more about these small individual words that we reacted to instinctively based on our past experience that I thought we needed to change.
Mary Fran: Well, I could go on and on, but I won’t. A couple of my favorite commandments, one of the first ones that always sticks out in my mind is “thou shalt stop should’ing thyself.” They play on words is also intentional, but as women, we are always building our should and shouldn’t’s lists, and should often equals obligation, things that we think that we have to do. And shouldn’t often equals denial. I shouldn’t buy these shoes, I shouldn’t be watching TV right now, I shouldn’t be you know, taking a nap, I shouldn’t, whatever. So, I suggest we change those words to “must” and “want.” I must do this, but I want to do that. And we kind of shift our whole dynamic.
Terry: That is great, and I was very carefully listening to the “should” part. I love that, “must” and “want,” I just wrote that down. Thank you, this is a gift. A couple more? If we have time I’d love some more.
Mary Fran: One of the other commandments that I always encourage women is: “thou shalt scare thyself.” And as women, especially if we have kids we tend to think of fear as a bad thing because we’re always protecting everyone. But, you know there was a time in our lives that fear was fine, you know just haunted housed and roller coasters, and that sense of fear makes us feel alive. So, we need to hook into that, I talk about how I went kayaking a couple of summers ago, and I tried surfing, and all these crazy bizarre things that really, I’m terrified of. But they were so exhilarating when I tried them. I didn’t succeed at them very well, but I tried them and it really poked me into feeling alive
Terri: I love that. You know people talk about feel the fear and do it anyway, so I’ve found the more I do things that are out of my comfort zone, the more confidence I have in myself. Does that make sense?
Mary Fran: Absolutely. And all of those commandments give way to the next book, where one of the dirty words is the word comfortable. We all like to be comfortable, when it becomes dangerous when we kind of sit ourselves in this figurative bean bag chair, and then we can’t get out of it, you know? We’re stuck in this figurative bean bag chair, we can’t get our butts up to do anything fun and exciting, so that we have to be careful of that word. Comfortable is fine in small doses, but make sure you’re scaring yourself a little every day.
Terri: I love that! Make sure you’re scaring yourself a little every day, I like that, I like that, I resonate with that. I literally could have you on the show for hours, and I’m going to definitely have you come back, because so much more that you talked about when I heard you speak. If anyone’s looking for a speaker, I really want to highly endorse and recommend Mary Fran Bontempo. She’s probably one of the best speakers I’ve heard, and I’ve heard them all. So, it’s true, I really want you to know that.
Mary Fran: Thank you so much.
Terri: You’re welcome. How can the listeners get in touch with you, where can they get your books? I know people are going to resonate with you.
Mary Fran: Well, lucky for everybody, I’m just all over social media, I mean, I am everywhere. And that can be a blessing or a nightmare depending on how you look at it. But I am all over the place, mayfranbontemo.com is my website, as you mentioned, Not Ready for Granny Panties is the blog. There are links all over the place there that will take you to the books which are on Amazon and Barnes & Noble, and they can find everything they want, maryfranbontempo.com
Terri: Excellent. I can’t thank you enough for being here. I already am smiling and feel like I’m going about my day in just a very different day. One of my take-aways today is I’m going to notice when I say “fine.”
Mary Fran: Yes, be aware.
Terri: Have awareness. Mary Fran Bontempo, thanks so much for joining us, and go over to notreadyforgrannypanties.com and also maryfranbontempo.com, you’ll be glad you did. Thanks again for joining us Mary Fran.
Mary Fran: Terri, it was a joy, thank you so much.
Terri: And for the listeners, please make sure that actually subscribe to the show, this way you’ll never miss a show. I have more great guest coming up over the week like Mary Fran Bontempo, I want to make sure you don’t miss any. Do me a favor, share the show and also would you give us some good recommendations and give us some love, we appreciate you. Look forward to seeing you here back next time at Heartrepreneur Radio.
Terri: Welcome back to Heartrepreneur Radio, this is Terri Levine, Chief Heartrepreneur and Business Strategist with a very special show and a very special guest, so thanks for tuning in. Today I have with me Leslie Karen Hammond. She’s called the empowering story whisperer. Leslie’s a three-time author: Keep It Real: Why We’re Afraid to Speak Up and What to do About It, Women Rising: How to go from Uncomfortable to Unstoppable, and Tap Your Source. She’s also a modern-day medicine woman, and a national facilitator. Leslie teaches health coaches and healers how to embrace their triumph through adversity as a teaching tool to inspire global change. I just have goose bumps saying the empowering story whisperer, welcome to Heartrepreneur Radio Leslie.
Leslie: Thank you Terri, so happy to be here.
Terri: Well, I’m delighted to have you and I have start by asking you, how did you get this title: the empowering story whisperer?
Leslie: Well it took a lot of work quite frankly. I ultimately reflected back upon the greatest value that I provide to my clients, and when it all boils down to it, it’s certainly about helping them become empowered by their stories instead of running from it.
Terri: Mmm, I know. I’ve seen that a lot in coaching and mentoring, I see people who are trying to overlook their story, and trying to ignore their story. And it causes a lot of issues in their lives, and their businesses, and even in their health. Would you agree with that?
Leslie: Absolutely. The body never lies. Never lies.
Terri: Mmm. So, one of the things I noticed for myself is, lots of my clients don’t speak up. There are situations at work, in life, personal situation, and yet they truly don’t speak up. And I’m a pretty confident person, and yet, sometimes I have some hidden stories, being really transparent with you. What would you say about that, what do you do about that?
Leslie: Well, for one thing, you’re in good company, and it’s really how the story is framed. When it is used as a tool for teaching and empowering others, it makes all the difference in the world. When everyone is experienced a person, you know, telling their story, and its bad news after bad news, and you feel bad, sometimes so much so you need to step back from the person because energetically, it’s just too much to take in. But, when a story can be framed in a positive light, and show that there was something learned, something that can be taught, passed on to potentially save another person in pain, that makes all the difference.
Terri: I love that. I love your language on that, it’s excellent. So, talk to me a little bit about this working with health coaches and healers, embracing their triumph through adversity. Talk to me about what that actually means, and what that looks and feels like.
Leslie: Well, so many women get into these fields because of their own struggles. I’ve worked with a health coach before who had a lot of food addictions, as well as other addictions. And, she really was bothered by coming out into the world when she felt that she had not yet achieved perfection, as she still had some food issues, and therefore she was really guarded. And because she hadn’t mastered absolutely everything that she was teaching to the degree where, she could be fully vulnerable and you know, be praised. It really impacted her in an adverse manner, so as soon as we could get her to fully appreciate her whole journey that she was human, and that piece of her that wasn’t perfect is exactly what her clients needed to hear. Because, perfection is unattainable, and it really adds this human element to things and makes people approachable.
Terri: I agree with you. One of the things I say a lot of times to clients, we’re perfect with our imperfections. You know, look at diamonds, brilliant shiny diamonds, and all diamonds are flawed and yet we look at them and say oh its beautiful, and it’s brilliant. So, we’re brilliant, we’re magnificent with those imperfections, I love that, I love that. So, how did you get into this work, what brought you here?
Leslie: Oh goodness. An 18-year marriage to an alcoholic, and a lot of worthiness and abandonment issues.
Terri: Mmm, wow, thanks for keeping that real. And what happened, one day you just woke up and decided to make a change? If you don’t mind sharing that with us?
Leslie: Oh, not at all. I sought out therapy for being constantly angry and I found that talk therapy didn’t work. Within probably 2 week of that, I went to a psychic fair, I had a reading from a woman who was also a Reiki master and a Shaman. I went to every Reiki course that she did, became a Karuna certified master in 2 years, and I began Shamanic studies and I found that that was home. It really just changed everything and helped me realize that all of the pain I had gone through, not just in that marriage, but long before that, it was all for a very good purpose.
Terri: Oh I love that. And thank you for being vulnerable and sharing that, I think it’s so helpful to the listeners, thank you. I guess it’s a couple years ago now, maybe two years ago, for the first time ever I went and worked with a Shaman. And, I’ve done so much personal development Leslie, over the course of my life, I actually thought, what more could I do? It was probably the deepest work that I’ve ever gone through, and the most life changing. And really, I’m gonna use the word “healing” because it truly went back and it healed all this inner-child stuff that I didn’t even know I was walking around with, and for the first time in my life after that, I can honestly say I fell in love with myself.
Leslie: Mmm, it really is a privilege for, not only the recipient, but also for the practitioner to hold space for someone to transform like that. Frankly, that is my favorite part of the work, is truly soul food to see someone transform. And I understand that it’s such a privilege for everyone that comes to me that has that experience.
Terri: Mmm, that’s beautiful. So, who’s the average person who comes to you? What’s going on in their business or in their lives, what makes them reach out? I’m just curious because this empowering story whisperer is really resonating with me.
Leslie: Well they’re people who are healers themselves, or you know they’re health coaches or they’re Yogi’s, or you know they had a really challenging time in their life. And people come to me in different phases, so sometimes it’s for a local ceremonies or you know if I’m traveling maybe I’ll do a ceremony across the country. But, a lot of times they’re really looking for a community where they can really be accepted for who they are, exactly where they’re at, and they’re hungry. It’s as though they’re seeking the next level of where they can be. And for those who are the bravest, and the ones who really believe that whatever they’re going through at the moment is really holding them back from something more beautiful and expansive then they can possibly imagine, then they step forward and experience the extraordinary break throughs that they hadn’t had the courage to address before.
Terri: What happens as a result of somebody working with you?
Leslie: Oh, all kinds of beautiful things. Well, their energy shifts, they become a lot for confident, they can own their past and see it in a completely new light. And they have the ability to forgive people who have come into their life and caused them pain, and they can now see them as the teachers that they are, instead of someone who is just trying to make their life miserable. And in some cases when people move to the next level, then they feel so confident that I take them through the process of publishing a book
Leslie: So, I help them write their story from beginning to end, and then we publish the book. And then, if they’re ready to take it a step further, then I can help them speaking and crafting a talk that will really help people into them and attract their ideal clients.
Terri: Now that’s brilliant, that’s really different and I resonate with that. I really, really like that, that is actually brilliant. You know it’s interesting, I often tell people everybody has a story, I really believe we all do and that we’ve got stories within us and we can all write our stories. And, at the same time, I certainly meet people who say, oh well I’m not interested in being published. You know what? You don’t need to be, you don’t have to be. Getting your story out changes everything.
Leslie: Oh, it does. And I tell people quite frankly that the book is the by-product of the process.
Terri: Mmm, oh I love that. By-product of the process, love that. Oh, I tell you, your wording, I just have to take a moment and acknowledge you. Your wording just gives me goosebumps, I love how you language things.
Leslie: Thank you
Terri: You’re welcome. How do people get in touch with you, where do they get their books? How do they move forward to get more information and then perhaps even decide to work with you?
Leslie: Thank you for asking. They can go to my website with my name: lesliekarenhammond.com They can also find me on Facebook, the business page is Healing Through Your Story, and there will be an abundance of information they can find in both places. On the Facebook page, there are a lot of Facebook live recordings that they can go back and check out, so I’m always offering material to give people new insights into how they can shift their prospective.
Terri: That is fabulous. So, I’m going to recommend that you do head over to lesliekarenhammond.com, and I want to acknowledge the Facebook page. Healing Through Your Story is the Facebook page, and it’s nice in long tale, it says exactly what the benefit is, and what’s going to happen as a result of getting to work with Leslie. So, Leslie, thank you. Are there any last words of wisdom you want to share before we need to sign off?
Leslie: I would invite every person who listens to this, to embrace every experience that you’ve ever had for the teaching moment that it is. And the sooner that you can embrace it in that way, the faster you’ll be getting towards where you really want to go, in heart, mind and spirit.
Terri: Ah, brilliantly said. And I’ll just piggy-back on that and say everything that happens in your life is a gift, no matter what is seems like in the moment. Leslie, thank you so much for being here. And don’t forget Heartreprenuer’s, lesliekarenhammond.com, and on Facebook, Healing Through Your Story. So, Leslie again, thank again for being with us on Heartrepreneur Radio.
Leslie: Thank you Terri, it’s been a pleasure.
Terri: And for the listeners, please do not forget, subscribe to the show, that way you don’t miss any episodes. I’ve got some more great guests like Leslie Karen Hammond coming up, so make sure you subscribe. We love when you share the show, and when you give us the positive ratings on the show, we love that too. Thanks again for tuning in, and tune in next time here, at Heartrepreneur Radio.
Terri: Hello and welcome to Heartrepreneur Radio, this is Terri Levine, chief Heartrepeneur and business strategist, and I’m really glad you keep tuning. And I’m particularly excited that you’re here for this episode because I do have a very special guest today, so let me just tell you. With a pink slip in her hand, and the words “you’re fired” echoing in her ear, Bernadette Boas went on a journey and discovered what it took to discover, confront, and shed her bitches of fear, insecurity, and low self-worth, to create and accelerate the riches she possesses in her business and life. And she is here to talk about a formula she came up, the 5-Step Shift to Riches, I just love the name of that, so you can consider what bitches you need to shed to finally create the riches you deserve. Whoo-hoo, welcome to the show Bernadette!
Bernadette: Thank you Terri, thank you very much.
Terri: I just love this, and we were chatting before we went live here on the show, I had the honor and privilege of being on your show a while ago, and I’m so excited to have you here on Heartrepeneur Radio.
Bernadette: Oh, thank you for having me.
Terri: You’ve welcome. So, I have so many different things that I want to ask you. But I really love that you talk about the word “bitch,” bitches of fear, how did you come up with like, language it that way, and deciding the right word for it?
Bernadette: In an emotional breakdown in a conversation with someone! I was just kind of revealing my story and my challenges, and all the sudden she’s like, well why are you getting so emotional about it? And I said because I was such a, or I shedded my bitch and now I’m like this happy, happy person. So, all the sudden, she’s like, that’s a great, even a book. And it went from there.
Terri: So first tell us a little bit about how you actually did this shedding, and then I definitely want to hear about the book. Let’s start with, how did you do this shedded? I mean, I heard the words in my life, “you’re fired,” so I know what that’s like, or at least what it was like for me, so how did you go through this shift?
Bernadette: Well, I realized after I was fired, I really kind of had to sit back and say, why did that just happen? I was a very talented, skilled individual, but during my own discover classes, I was realizing that the leadership style I chose for my self was more aggressive, more curt, more demanding as opposed to a commanding, leadership personality. And I hated when I discovered that, I felt so ashamed that I was cruel to other people, or I was demeaning, or curt or abrasive, and I just knew I had to, at the same time I wanted to. I wanted to put good in the world, like Heartrepreneur does, I wanted to put heart into the world, and not the type of angst I was wreaking havoc on to so many people. And so, I just went through this discovery process, that I had to confront those bitches, which I discovered that because I realized Terri, that people aren’t per say, bitches. It is their insecurities, negativities, fears and doubts that cause them to lash out in that way. And that’s why I kind of categorized those emotions, those inner-demons, because as the bitches, because that’s what really get people to just be, not the person they should be I’ll say.
Terri: Yes, yes. Wow, this is, I mean this is fascinating. I remember when I was given the words “you’re fired,” in Corporate America and I really did look back on how I reacted and how I responded, and there was a lot of me that had some, won’t I won’t want to call, some Corporate bitchiness. So, it’s kind of interesting.
Bernadette: Right, right.
Terri: Now how did you decide to write the book, and what was the process like?
Bernadette: The process was amazing. The same women I was having a break-down in front of when she said that would make a great book, or a greater kind of brand, so to speak, cuz we were at a business conference, I just said to myself, you know I’ve been journaling since I was eight or nine. I have 100’s of journals, they might be able to tell me something, and at the same time once Cassidy told me, gave me this idea, I started talking to people about it. Like, would you learn from someone who is acknowledging that they were this type of Corporate tyrant, and that they’ve made changes and shifts in their lives, would that be valuable to you? I was inundated with women and men that said absolutely. So, I went just along and I kind of started kind of journaling my story as I saw it right then and there, but then I did go back to my previous journal, and really kind of look through them to see if there was something that I could learn from, and if there was something they were trying to tell me. And it was, oh my gosh, it was so eye-opening. I believe in journaling, and it’s something that I’d never read them before, I never would go back through my journals and read them before. I would just write and scribble, and then move on, and here I decided I was going to stick with my words, however they were, whether I liked them or not, that’s the confronting, so it’s discovering and confronting. And the I knew if I wanted to change, if I wanted something different, something new, I would have to shift, or shed, what I didn’t like about myself.
Terri: Wow, that’s profound. You know I’ve been journaling since I’m 17, which is quite a long time, and one of the things I do is I go back every year and I’ll randomly pull out five, 10 journals, and I’ll read through them.
Terri: It’s amazing, right? The process of journaling is amazing, and the process of reading what you’ve written and what’s happening in your life, and in your business, is just phenomenal, right?
Bernadette: Ya, it is. And I’ll still admit that I don’t go back and read what I write even today. I kind of purge it, and let it take a life of its own, however, to your point, I’m sure there will come a day where I’ll want to write the second, third or fourth chapter of this journey, and therefore will go back and rely on those journals to kind of help me with that.
Terri: Ya, it’s great that you’re keeping them I think on so many levels, I think that’s awesome. So, I know that many people call you a ball of fire. What does that mean when people are saying: well Bernadette, she’s a ball of fire! What does that mean?
Bernadette: I think it really means, it kind of interprets a leadership style that I’ve also uncovered and now, you know, really look for in individuals. I think it’s one who does seek out their goals and their dreams despite their fears. It’s one who is kind of bold in how they approach, first themselves, because I truly believe everything starts with you first. And then they just go out and hope to be able to take on life with those fears, though they look at them as just being simple uncomfortable when they come up, so they push through that uncomfortable feeling in order to realize the riches that they want in aspect of their life. So, ball of fire to me is someone who’s kind of bold, risk taking, every-learning, ever-growing, and really just wanting to be their true self.
Terri: Mm wow, a lot like a Heartrepeneur.
Bernadette: It is, it is! No I would agree with you.
Terri: I love it, I love it. And then you talk about the shift to riches formula, so say a little about that please.
BB: Well I had discovered through my own, I would say, year and a half, two years leading up to writing the book, I discovered that I did go through these stages. Almost like the stages of mourning death or a divorce, and I realized that I had to discover myself. I to then confront those things I loved myself, but those things that I also didn’t like about myself, actually that I hated about myself. And then I needed to shed what it was that I no longer wanted to carry forward with me, while I also enhanced and enriched those aspects of myself that I did love about myself. And then you would move on to once you’ve really discovered, confronted and shedded all of those things, there is no way that you don’t want to create something different, something new, a shift in your life. And therefore, you go about really kind of upping your game, or changing your goals or whatever the case might be, and as you are creating, there is nothing that will stop you from wanting to accelerate that feeling of just freedom, and self-love, and giving. And at the same time receiving, learning how to receive cuz many of us, especially women, we’re not good receivers, we’re good caretakers. And so, this formula of discovering, confronting and shedding the bitches in your life in order for you create, accelerate the riches in your life, is just kind of a view on the fact that it’s not just about your skill. But it also about your mindset that has to be worked on each and every day in order to achieve your goals.
Terri: Mm, I think that’s fabulous, I think that’s so important. So, if someone’s listening right now, Heartrepreneur listening right now and they’re saying I want to do something, I want to take some action in this moment, and I want to start my shift to riches. What’s something they could physically do that would start to make a change for them?
Bernadette: Well if they could jot down while they’re listening to this, if they could jot down those five steps, even the little bit that we talked about. And I would say if they had carried with them a journal, I have a small little one, pocket sized one, that allows me to pull it out when I need to or want, and if they really just start getting to know themselves. Physically just pay attention to what makes them happy, what doesn’t make them happy. What gives they joy, what gives them angst or just frustration, and then just really kind of want to acknowledge those things. And then they decide for themselves, not let any other people influence them, but decide for themselves what it is that they want to carry forward, and what it is that they want to shift, or shed, or change and start anew. So, for me, journaling is a really great, great tool, not just a hobby or a passion of someone’s, but also a tool that they can use in their business, in their career, in their life and all aspects.
Terri: Thank you for that. It’s interesting to me, I don’t know I’ve been coaching, consulting 20-something years and one of the first things that I have my clients do is start to carry a journal, just like you said.
Terri: So I think it is probably the simplest, the easiest and yet one of the best coaching tools. Because you do get to know yourself, hear your inner-voice, get to decipher your real true wants, your likes, your dislikes. I think that’s fabulous, fabulous advice, thank you for that. Where can people get your book?
Bernadette: Well of course it’s on Amazon, so they can go to Amazon and just look up Shedding the Corporate Bitch. They call also go to balloffireconsulting.com and it’s there as well.
Terri: So, get your book, I highly recommend this, male or female. I think it’s going to be very powerful and very, very helpful for you, Shedding the Corporate Bitch. And then the website one more time?
Terri: And it’s easy to remember because here I am, talking to Bernadette Boas who is the ball of fire, right? You know and I’ll just say to the listeners, you know maybe you haven’t been fired, maybe you haven’t had a Corporate position. In my experience, it doesn’t matter. We all have these elements and these pieces, male or female of some, pardon my language here, bitchiness. So, taking a good look at ourselves and really taking a look at this process is going to be extremely beneficial, so go and get a copy of Shedding the Corporate Bitch. Bernadette, anything else that you want to add before I allow to give some info so people can connect with you?
Bernadette: I would just say, and I say this often. You have one life to live, it goes really, really fast, so decide for yourself how you want to live it, what you want to experience, and what you want to leave when this one life is passed on to others. And you know, just live it, just be you and live it.
Terri: Aw I have goosebumps from that, oof. I often say to clients, how do you intent to experience your life, because in every moment you get that choice, and you get the power to create that. Life is so precious and it’s short. Oh wow, you have been a ball of fire! How can people get in touch with you, find out about your consulting and your services?
Bernadette: Well they can definitely go to balloffireconsulting.com and they’ll see all my services, and my training, and my speaking and the places that I’ll be. At the same time, they can reach out to me directly, which a lot of people do, they can reach out to me at email@example.com, and I would love to help them in any way possible.
Terri: You have already helped, you’ve been awesome, true Heartrepreneur Bernadette Boas, thank you so much for being my guest here on Heartrenpreneur Radio today.
Bernadette: Thank you
Terri: You are welcome, thank you for tuning into Heartrepreneur Radio, we want you to come back and not to miss an episode. And the best way to do that is actually to subscribe to the show right on iTunes, so go ahead and subscribe to the show, that way you will never miss an episode of Heartrepreneur Radio. And if you go over to heartrepreneur.com, we’ve got some extra free resources and tools just to help you have more heart in your business and in your life. Thank you for tuning in today, thanks for joining me, and I’ll see you next time on Heartrepreneur Radio.